the end of an era

I will never forget my feeling at that specific moment. this indefinite response prompted by the sight of my son sitting at a table with five other kids for the very first time in his life. I think it was pride. or love. I'm not sure.

many days have followed. I've felt miserable, relieved, sad, annoyed and happy. I've hated everytime I closed the front door behind me but loved the exhilaration of reappearing in my children's life at the end of the day. I've leaned on walls, grabbed my face, wiped some tears and resented myself everytime I heard them cry. I've been stricken with guilt as an aftermath of my boy clinging to me and not letting go. but I've been blessed to see my sons grow from denim overalls aficionados who were not vocally expressive and fell everytime they attempted to jump or run too fast to articulate little boys who can write their own names.

today we said goodbye to the five incredible women who have been wiping Sean and Will's little bottoms and teaching them how to sing, share, ask, eat, thank, play, draw, forgive and love for the past two years.

today was the last time I ever cooked pasta at 8am and wrote my sons' names on yogurts and disposable plastic boxes.

today we're back from an impromptu trip to IKEA where we bought a hobby horse for Sean and finger puppets for Will.

today was officially Sean and Will's last day at daycare.

Comments

[blackbird]

there are new milestones all the time.

[carol]

You are so fortunate that you had two full years with the same teachers. the boys are so lucky to have had that. My kids have gone through so many teachers and schools. Appreciate what you've had and look forward to Kindergarten - we both need to hang on, it's going to be quite a ride!!!!!!!!!

[Lucinda]

Wow. You paint such a different, soothing picture of daycare than most- How bittersweet this day must have been for you. I love the way you savor each moment with your sons. Blogs are nice the way they let you do that, aren't they?

[Momcat]

Ditto on Carol's comment. I'm a nervous wreck thinking about my son going to school. I never imagined I'd be this way. After all, my son is going to be 6 when he enters and he did a full year of going every day to a pre-K program last year. But, here I am, feeling sick already at the prospect of putting him on the bus.

Why do I think all of our blogs are going to sound a lot alike in the next few weeks? HA! Glad someone else understands...

[llamaschool]

Another beautiful post. I am with Lucinda, what a relief to trust and admire those with whom you leave your child. I'm still not sure I'll be able to find that in the US. I could point out how lucky you are to live in France, but you know that!

[Marilyn]

Awww, how sweet. On to bigger and better things, Sean and Will! (Even though daycare in Paris sounds like it ROCKS!) :)

[Melissa]

and soon you will be a proud Momma once again when Sean and Will start school.

beautiful post, Irene. As always :)

[Vanessa_AR]

Okay, what is with the pasta cooking? At 8 a.m.? You are TOO good!!